What is the enchantment of the blockbuster hit “New Moon” and the upcoming “Eclipse” movies?   It is a mixture of the age old story line of young romance intertwined with a combination of the mystical seduction of vampires.

For some reason, this movie has not only attracted teenage girls but also has seduced their moms.  One of the young stars of the show revealed the bizarre incident when a mother who stood in line with her teenage daughter to meet him asked if she could take off her panties for him to autograph.

What you should know as a father:

Vampires are mythological beings who feed off of the blood of the living.

This is a direct assault on the teachings of God.  The Bible says, “Do not eat any meat with the blood still in it. ” ‘Do not practice divination or sorcery.” God established this on the principle that “life is in the blood.”  It is a practice of sorcery (evokers of the dead).

Vampires are representatives of fallen spirits who look upon women with lust.

The Apostle Paul instructed that women should have a covering of authority for the sake of the angels (1 Corinthians 11:10).  He was referring to the evil practice of angels who lust for women.  As a father, you are the authority over your daughter in the spirit realm.

Vampires are androgynous in appearance, gaunt and pale.

Their thin appearance is very different from their original descriptions as plump, bloated, monsters who gorged on the flesh and blood of the living.   The new image makes them more attractive and seductive to some women.

Vampires were originally synonymous with Satan.

The attraction to the Evil Being has always been on the base ideas of sexual relations.  There was a time that Genesis describes as when the ”sons of God had relations with the daughters of men.“ This is often considered as a time with the fallen angels intermingled with women.

For those who think that this story line is cute, consider this: A modern day vampire would be Jeffrey Dahmer, a serial killer who killed 17 people. His murders were particularly gruesome, involving rape, torture, dismemberment,necrophilia and cannibalism. The details of his story are gruesome and not worth exploring. If you think that its no big deal – think about your daughter being seduced by this vile man.

The bottom line is that creating a fantasy of the mythological vampire in the minds of young women (or for that matter adult women) is dangerous and offensive to what is right and moral.

Derek continues his series on friends. When you and your brother (friend) have a disagreement, don’t take the grievance to someone else. Talk directly to your friend and you’ll be amazed how easily differences can be worked out.  Click here to view on YouTube.

Check out Derek’s Facebook page for more great videos.

Don’t you wish there was a great big “Undo” button in life; where you could completely erase your parenting mistakes? I bet some parents would give anything for such a button.

Unfortunately, there is no such “undo” button. But perhaps the best way to avoid the need for one is to avoid the kind of mistakes parents sometimes make. To learn what those could be, you might sit down with a few veteran parents to ask them what they would have done differently if they could turn back time; in other words, what they would have “undone” if they could have. And that’s exactly what I did this week, through our Facebook page. Hindsight is always 20-20, and if the regrets expressed by these parenting veterans are taken to heart by current and upcoming parents, it may help the “rookies” avoid some of the same heartaches.

If parents could do it over again…

They’d be more consistent, worry less, seek to spend more time together, and interact more lovingly.

I have to admit, I was surprised by the direction of the answers. I was half expecting people to feed back to me some of my recent parenting tips, like: “I should have gotten my teenager a part-time job and a checkbook to manage earlier,” or, “I shouldn’t have allowed her to date so young.” But those who responded seemed to be thinking a few levels deeper, which tells me that they put some heavy thought into their brief responses. I’ve grouped them into three main areas of concern: “worrying less, “being more consistent,” and “spending more time together.” These definitely came to the forefront.

Here are some of their “If I could do it over again, here’s what I would change” responses…

More Consistency:

• I’d be consistent and make my “no’s” count.
• I’d learn how to be consistent!
• I’d be more consistent.
• I’d have been more consistent and disciplined about chores and physical activity.
• I would have been more CONSISTENT. Not being consistent causes problems every time.
• I’d have created home rules and backed them up. We did too much discipline “on the fly” which made us very inconsistent.
• I’d be more consistent.
• I would make sure my husband and I were on the same page in parenting BEFORE we had problems that needed addressed!! That is most important — to be consistent — and not being so has caused many heartaches.

Worry Less:

• I’d not worry so much about what I may be doing wrong. I have found that you can do everything “right” and still make mistakes. I’d just relax and enjoy parenting and enjoy my kids — they are fantastic!
• I would not have been so protective of my oldest son during high school. He never gave me reason to not let go. I was just so worried about him getting hurt that I said “no” to way too much. Now he’s in college and we rarely see him because he is finally “free.”
• I would not worry so much.
• I’d not worry about the little stuff!
• I would tell myself not to worry so much.
• I’d worry less about being normal…what’s normal anyways !?!?!
• I’d worry less… someone once told me that if I was worrying more about their schooling, future, etc., than they were, I was worrying too much. Come to find out they were right!
• I’d relax. Surrender. Trust. Enjoy…

Spend More Time Together:

• We’d have more family time!
• I have a 17-year-old daughter and I did not spend enough one on one time talking or spending time together. There is a distance between us that I hope not to make the same mistake with my younger daughters.
• We would have more family time and one-on-one.
• I would’ve turned off the TV more and pursued mutual interests with my kids.
• I’d spend more time with the kids, work away from home less often.
• I’d play with my child more when she was little, like play dolls, pretend, tag, hide and seek and catch more fireflies.
• I would have gotten used to less television and electronics (and other distractions) and more games together inside and outside.
• We’d have more dinners together. No matter if we talk…we are together.
• I’d not work as much and be home with family more.

The thing that strikes me about all three of these categories is that they have more to do with the parents’ attitudes and attempts at relationship than the actions of their kids. In fact, they have little to do with the teenager and mostly to do with how the parent responded or didn’t respond. But as you read between the lines, the remorse felt by these parents is likely brought on by the resulting damage to the relationship they have with their children, which perhaps continues to be strained today.

The other main category of response has to do with parent-child interaction; and again, it has more to do with the parent’s interaction than the teenager’s. Here is what they said…

Interact More Lovingly and Respectfully:

• I’d listen more and lecture less. I’d not force everything down their throat and expect them to obey as it does not work that way anymore…they will REBEL and that causes all the heartaches!
• I’d apologize more.
• I’d not yell as much.
• I would have stopped yelling and given them more respect.
• I wouldn’t argue with my husband in front of my children. I would allow my kids express themselves more, and not suppress their feelings.
• I’d listen more, lecture less and ask their opinion on issues more. Stay engaged when the going was tough.
• I wouldn’t argue with them, even though they seem to thrive on arguing.
• I’d teach the entire family how to have loving healthy communication.
• I’d love unconditionally.
• I’d give more hugs and kisses (even when they become a teen). Sometimes we parents feel that “uncomfortable” feeling because they are getting older…that is when they need it the most.

These parents came to the conclusion that their own actions may have contributed to how they interact with their adult children today, or how their children continue to cope with life today. If they had access to an “Undo Life” button, they’d surely make some changes. So, take care in your own parenting. The teen years — though they may seem arduous and never-ending with some kids — are actually short-lived. Then you have the rest of your lives together. The wise advice from these parents? Be consistent…spend time with them…interact more lovingly…and worry less.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Mark Gregston is an author, speaker, radio host, and the founder and director of Heartlight, a residential program for struggling adolescents located in East Texas. Join the discussion on on Mark’s Facebook page: www.facebook.com/parentingteens

The seed of disagreement starts with a murmur.

Murmuring is an argument that is not voiced properly. It is an under-the-breath complaint. A grunt. A murmur is difficult to answer because the complaint—however legitimate—fails to communicate.

A murmur unaddressed matures to become strife.

Strife is a force of resistance. It is still unspoken, but you can feel it. When you enter a room where strife is present, your spirit immediately picks it up, your emotions become anxious and you sense danger.

Strife takes on evil work.

Evil work is actions that lead to the plotting and scheming to get one’s own way. Evil work takes on vain imaginations and delusions.

The next level is manipulation.

Manipulation is a “desire for political office by unfair means.” It is the beginning process of usurping authority. It is referred to as Machiavellian, which is a political manifesto on how to maneuver politically.

Manipulation gives way to witchcraft.

Witchcraft is not an old wrinkled woman stirring concoctions in a cauldron. It is the use of words to invoke a curse rather than a blessing. Couples resort to witchcraft when speaking with familiarity, practicing put-downs, and critical remarks. Coarse jesting to damage a person’s respect is a form of witchcraft.

Witchcraft gives place to rebellion.

Rebellion is the level at which a person accepts the spirit of Lucifer. Rebellion is a filthy sin against protocol. It is dangerous. This is where people get hurt.

Rebellion matures to the final level of disagreement: division.

The dividing of one to become two. It is the antipathy of two becoming one. This is why God hates divorce.

The scheme of division is placed in action because the Nemesis of man fears the principle of agreement. He know that when two agree on earth, touching anything, it will be done. No force on earth can stop the power of agreement. Whether in marriage, in business, or in life, learn to practice the principle of agreement. You will be unstoppable.

The mother of a 15-year old Seattle girl is furious because her daughter had an abortion with some assistance from the nurses at her school and she was never informed. She only found out after the fact when her daughter had an unrelated health problem and finally revealed she had terminated a pregnancy.

The girl attends Ballard High School in Seattle which has a teen health clinic inside. The clinic is run by Swedish Medical Center and administered by the King County Health Department.

According to the girl’s mother, who did not want to give her name, her daughter was given a pregnancy test at the school clinic which was positive. She was then told by the nurse that she could have an abortion at a nearby Planned Parenthood clinic without her parents’ knowledge.

The girl then called a taxi, which picked her up at the school and drove her by herself to Planned Parenthood. The mother says once at the clinic a Planned Parenthood worker discouraged her daughter from informing her parents. She claims the worker told her that if she kept quiet the procedure would be free, but if she told her parents they would have to pay for the abortion.

The mother acknowledges she signed a consent form at the beginning of the school year giving the school permission to administer health care off campus. She assumed that meant in cases of emergency. Nowhere on the form is abortion mentioned.

A King County Health official would not speak about any of the details surrounding the case, but did say that no laws were broken. In Washington State a girl of any age can get an abortion without her parent’s being notified. It’s one of 15 states without either parental consent or parental notification laws.

The county health official also says that schools routinely send kids in taxis when they’re taken off campus for medical procedures.

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What’s missing in the above article?

There is not one mention of a male. The argument of abortion has been segregated from men. Society has alienated us from the conversation. We are given no “right” to speak to this subject.

Completely absent in this story is a reference to the father of the child who fathered the infant that was aborted, nor the father of the 15-year-old child fleeced by the public school and the eugenic engineers of Planned Parenthood.

Where are the fathers?

It is time for authentic manhood to give voice to this scourge on our society. Our strategy will not work by yelling or demanding to be notified.  We must circumvent the process by not giving woman the “choice” to slay our children.

Solomon addressed it this way, “Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers.”

We need to teach our sons that they deposit “life-giving-seed” and they should protect their “streams” from an unworthy woman. We should place an extreme value on the seed of mankind. Man is progenitor of humankind. We are responsible for the sowing of seed.

Let’s circumvent the argument. Let’s resurrect manhood so that our sons value themselves and their seed again. Let’s teach our sons to be gallant in their relationships, respecting themselves with the dignity of the life-giver.

While digging up a withering wax myrtle tree beside his waterfront home on the Gulf coast, author Andy Andrews unearths a rusted metal container filled with Nazi artifacts and begins an intriguing investigation that unlocks an unspoken past that took place in his backyard… literally.

In 1942, as the country gears up for a full-scale commitment to WWII, German subs are dispatched to the Gulf of Mexico to sink U.S. vessels carrying goods and fuel. While taking a late-night walk, Helen Mason-widowed by war-discovers the near-lifeless body of a German sailor. Enraged at the site of Josef Landermann’s uniform, Helen is prepared to leave him to die when an unusual phrase, faintly uttered, changes her mind.

Set in a period simmering with anger and suspicion The Heart Mender offers the very real chronicle of a small town preparing itself for the worst the world has to offer. As cargo from torpedoed ships begins to wash up on the beach, Josef and Helen must reconcile their pasts to create a future.

Blending his unique style of historical accuracy with unparalleled storytelling, New York Times best-selling author Andy Andrews offers a tale of war, faith, and forgiveness illuminating the one principle that frees the human spirit.

The Heart Mender

Release Date May 4, 2010
Click Here To Pre-Order

It is likely no surprise to you that God has wired women and men differently. We all recognize some of these differences, but others often hide in plain sight. Shaunti Feldhahn, a nationally syndicated newspaper columnist, author and speaker wrote a fantastic book, For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men. In it, she recounts the surprising truths she learned about men after interviewing more than one thousand of them.

I had the opportunity to interview Shaunti for our radio broadcast, HomeWord with Jim Burns. In our discussion, we spoke about ten things guys wish women knew about men and I think this is good info for both sexes. I think you’ll find these ten things fascinating! Even more, I believe that in understanding these issues, you’ll be equipped to lead your marriage to a better place!

1. Men would rather feel unloved than inadequate and disrespected.

Husbands need to know that their wives respect them both privately and publicly. Men thrive when they know that their wives trust them, admire them and believe in them. Shaunti Feldhahn’s research indicated that men would rather sense the loss of loving feelings from their wives than to be disrespected by them.

2. A man’s anger is often a response to feeling disrespected by his wife.

When a husband becomes angry with his wife, he may not come out and say, “You’re disrespecting me!” But, there is a good likelihood that he is feeling stung by something his wife has done which he considers disrespectful and humiliating.

3. Men are often insecure.

Men are afraid that they aren’t cutting it in life — not just at work, but at home, in their role as a husband. They may never vocalize this, but inwardly, they are secretly vulnerable. The antidote? Affirmation. To men, affirmation from their wives is everything! If they don’t receive this affirmation from their wives, they’ll seek it elsewhere. When they receive regular and genuine affirmation from their wives (not flattery, by the way), they become much more secure and confident in all areas of their lives.

4. Men feel the burden of being the provider for their family.

Intellectually, it doesn’t matter how much or little a man makes, or whether or not his wife makes more or less money in her career. Men simply bear the emotional burden of providing for their family. It’s not a burden they’ve chosen to bear. Men are simply wired with this burden. As such, it is never far from their minds and can result in the feeling of being trapped. While wives cannot release their husbands from this burden, they can relieve it through a healthy dose of appreciation, encouragement and support.

5. Men want more sex.

Everyone’s natural response to this is probably, “Duh!” But, that response is probably for the wrong reason. We primarily assume that men want more sex with their wives due to their physical wiring (their “needs”). But, surprisingly, Shaunti Feldhahn’s research showed that the reason men want more sex is because of their strong need to be desired by their wives. Men simply need to be wanted. Regular, fulfilling sex is critical to a man’s sense of feeling loved and desired.

6. Sex means more than sex.

When men feel their wives desire them sexually, it has a profound effect on the rest of their lives. It gives them an increasing sense of confidence and well-being that carries over into every other area of his life. The flipside of this coin also carries a profoundly negative affect. When a husband feels rejected sexually, he not only feels his wife is rejecting him physically, but that she is somehow rejecting his life as a husband, provider and man. This is why making sex a priority in marriage is so incredibly important!

7. Men struggle with visual temptation.

This means the vast majority of men respond to visual images when it comes to women. And, this doesn’t just mean the guys with wandering eyes. Even the most godly husband cannot avoid noticing a woman who dresses in a way that draws attention to her body. Even if it is just a glance, these visual images are stored away in the male brain as a sort of “visual rolodex” that will reappear without any warning. Men can choose whether to dwell on these images and memories or dismiss them, but they can’t control when these images appear.

8. Men enjoy romance, but doubt their skills to be romantic.

True, many men appear to be unromantic clods, but it doesn’t mean that they want to be that way! Men want to be romantic, but they just doubt their ability to pull it off. They are plagued by internal hesitations, perceiving the risk of humiliation and failure as too high. Wives can do a great deal to increase their husbands’ confidence in their romantic skills through encouragement and redefining what romance looks like. For example, a wife may balk when her husband asks her to go along to the hardware store, but it’s likely that he’s asking because he sees it as a time they can get away as a couple and hang out together. What’s not romantic about that?

9. Men care about their wife’s appearance.

This isn’t saying that all men want their wives to look like the latest supermodel. What men really want is to know that their wives are making an effort to take care of themselves (and not letting themselves go) because it matters to them (the husbands!). Husbands appreciate the efforts their wives make to maintain their attractiveness.

10. Men want their wives to know how much they love them.

This was the number one response of men. Men aren’t confident in their ability to express this, but they love their wives dearly. Men want to show how much they love their wives and long for them to understand this fact.

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By Jim Burns, Ph.D
In response to the overwhelming needs of parents and families, Jim Burns founded HomeWord in 1985. HomeWord is a Christian organization designed to provide assistance to adults worldwide as they help young people make wise decisions and lead positive, vibrant, Christian lifestyles.

Printed by permission of HomeWord.  For additional information on HomeWord, visit www.homeword.com or call 800-397-9725.

It may motivate you more toward your own goals to know that some of the most famous and well-known people in modern times had to overcome as difficult obstacles as anyone before they finally reached the top It takes persistence and total commitment to your goals, but it’s possible!

You may not know the background of a certain laundry worker who earned sixty dollars a week at his job but had the burning desire to be a writer. His wife worked nights, and he spent nights and weekends typing manuscripts to send to publishers and agents. Each one was rejected with a form letter that gave him no assurance that his manuscripts had even been read. I’ve received a few of those special valentines myself through the years, and I can tell you first hand that they’re not the greatest self-esteem builders.

But finally, a warm, more personal rejection letter came in the mail to the laundry worker, stating that although his work was not good enough at this point to warrant publishing, he had promise as a writer and he should keep trying.

He forwarded two more manuscripts to the same friendly-yet-rejecting publisher over the next eighteen months, and as before, he struck out with both of them too. Finances got so tight for the young couple that they had to disconnect their telephone to pay for medicine for their baby.

Feeling totally discouraged, he threw his latest manuscript into the garbage. His wife, totally committed to his life goals and believing in his talent, took the manuscript out of the trash and sent it back to Doubleday, the publisher who had sent the friendly rejections. The book, titled Carrie, sold over five million copies, and as a movie, became one of the top-grossing films in 1976. The laundry worker, of course, was Stephen King.

The main message — believe in your ability to turn obstacles into opportunities. Too often people try to storm their obstacles as if they’re forts that need to be taken. It’s better to step back and ask yourself: “Did I cause this obstacle by my own actions or lack of them? Did someone else cause this obstacle? Is this obstacle one that grew out of the natural progression of circumstances?”

This last question may seem complex, but it holds a secret to the way you can set and reach your goals and achieve your destiny!

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Reproduced with permission from Denis Waitley’s Weekly Ezine.
To subscribe to Denis Waitley’s Weekly Ezine, go to www.deniswaitley.com
or send an email with Join in the subject to subscribe@deniswaitley.com
Copyright © Denis Waitley International. All rights reserved worldwide.

Contrary to what most moms and dads think, teens really do want rules. Rules help keep them headed in the right direction and prevent them from ending up in a place that they don’t want to be. When coupled with consequences, they help the teen more easily resist temptation and the inappropriate scheming of their peers. Having a good reason to say “No” comes as a relief to a teen raised to know basic moral values. Deep down, teens understand this, no matter how much they push against the rules, bend them, break them, and balk at them.

To be effective, rules need to be based on the boundaries you establish in your home, which are even more important and foundational for a child to learn. Boundaries aren’t the rules; they are the fence posts placed around behavior. They are the delineation of how a family’s beliefs are to be lived out; the “I will” and “I will not” statements that are the basis of our daily living and interaction with others. They help everyone in the family take responsibility for their own behavior, improve their choices, and know if they are headed into dangerous territory.

Boundaries define what you will and won’t accept, and should come from what you believe is right for your teen at this stage in his life and for your family.

An example of a boundary might be: “We will treat each other with mutual respect.”  If you believe that respect for one another has merit (I certainly do), then your boundary will include showing respect to those you live with, and teaching family members to respect authority and those outside the family as well. Being respectful means: not taking things without asking, not talking badly about another, not leaving a mess, not calling names or mouthing off.

On the positive side, being respectful means: celebrating one another’s successes, helping each other out when it’s needed, asking permission before using something that is not yours, or standing up for other family members. You fill in what you consider to be respectful and disrespectful practices.

Did you notice in this example that boundaries are about every member of the family, not just the kids? They are more about setting an accepted lifestyle and mode of interaction for everyone in the home, versus specific do’s and don’ts. If the boundaries are completely understood, then rules almost become redundant. For instance, “respect” would also cover issues like theft, honesty, caring for others, taking care of one’s belongings, etc.

Boundaries insure each family member takes responsibility for themselves and their own actions.

Boundaries include what your child already knows, what you’ve taught them all their life. But sometimes teens get confused by “childhood” rules within those boundaries and rules which are lifelong.  For instance, the boundary, “We will avoid unnecessary risks and dangers,” would include holding mom’s hand as you walk across the street as a child. This would of course not be appropriate in the teen years. Rather, it would shift more toward wearing a car seatbelt, a bike helmet, and not taking medications without a parent’s permission or doctor’s prescription in the teen years.

But another typical boundary, “We will avoid illegal activities,” is a lifelong boundary. It never changes, other than according to changes in the current laws. The goal, then, is to make it clear to your teen which boundaries and related rules are now appropriate for him, according to the values you hold dear and just common sense (you may have noticed that teens don’t always have a lot of common sense).

Boundaries aren’t just to corral behavior, but they are also for protecting teens from their peers on the other side of the fence. For instance, a teen girl should establish her own personal boundaries in regard to her body and not allow others to cross those boundaries with her.  Talk to her about those boundaries, so she solidifies them in her mind before the situation arises.

How to Establish Boundaries

Parents can begin to establish boundaries by picking their top ten or fifteen deeply held beliefs and then identifying boundaries for each. Think about and write down different real-life situations and how far things can go before your family boundaries will be violated.  Having too many boundaries can confuse the whole family and make it impossible to grow and adapt, so keep it simple.

Here are some examples of boundaries (yours may be different):

• We believe our home is a refuge, where there should be mutual respect for one another and for each other’s belongings, time and personal space.We believe in truth and honesty, so we will tell the truth (including the whole story). We will not bend the truth, gossip untruths or exaggerate.
• We believe that having positive and uplifting communications is important, so will not use inappropriate language, cussing, swearing, off-color stories, or yelling in anger.
• We believe that there is nothing good that can happen after midnight, so everyone should be home.
• We believe that excellence is important, so we expect everyone to do their best in what they do, including work, chores and school.
• We believe that faith is an important part of life, so we will participate in the activities and the fellowship of others in our church.

Boundaries Demand Rules and Consequences

If you wonder why teenagers behave irresponsibly, well, it’s because they are irresponsible.  And, they will not become responsible or mature, or wise, until they engage in the process of dealing with the consequences of their choices and behavior.  It is a cycle that needs to happen over and over before a teen comes to full maturity.

So, the next job is to create specific rules and then consequences for breaking those rules. That’s a job best developed by the whole family, so they feel as though they have contributed. You’ll be surprised how harsh your teen will make their own consequences, so it will be your job to make those more reasonable. And don’t forget to make the consequences escalate for each continued breach of the rules and match consequences with the severity of the infraction.

Keep In Touch

The point is this: your teen needs to learn how to make good choices. When they know in advance what the boundaries are, what the specific rules are, and what the consequences will be, they’ll more likely be able to make a better choice. At the very least, they’ll not be shocked and feel “ganged up” on when consequences are applied. “Mom’s might ground me for this” simply isn’t a concrete deterrent. Instead, “I’ll lose my cell phone for a month” is a clearer and more direct deterrent that will stick in the teen’s mind.

Boundaries are important. But teens are still prone to test them in every possible way.  So, as you develop and enforce healthy boundaries it is important to spend time with your child on a regularly scheduled basis to discuss them. This makes it clear to them that no matter what decisions they make; your relationship will not be affected.

Set up a weekly breakfast or dinner where you can talk, one to one. Avoid rehashing past mistakes but talk about better choices that can be made in the future and how those will positively impact your teen’s life. Help them begin to set goals and think about their purpose in life.  And be sure to begin and end your discussion with making sure your child understands that there is nothing they can do to make you love them more, and there’s nothing they can do to make you love them less.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Mark Gregston is an author, speaker, radio host, and the founder and director of Heartlight, a residential program for struggling adolescents located in East Texas.