God answered by saying, “Two nations are in your womb, and two peoples from within you will be separated; one people will be stronger than the other, and the older will serve the younger.”

God spoke to the generations within her, prophesying their future.  When it came time for their birth, the twins were in contention.  The first child to arrive was covered with red hair, so they named him Esau, which means Red.  Grasping the heel of Red was Jacob, which means to grasp the heel, or figuratively means to deceive.

Red was loved by his father.  He learned to be a skillful hunter, a man who liked to be out in the field.  He was loud, and rough-hewn.

Red wasn’t a thinker.  He didn’t have vision beyond his present appetite.  This exposed a weakness, his vulnerability to be deceived.

Rebekah loved Deceiver.  She schooled his quiet nature, kept him around the tents, dressed him in designer clothes, and taught him how to cook.  She also taught him the subtle techniques of deception.

Red came home from a failed day of hunting, when Deceiver welcomed him with a contract, “Will you trade a fresh bowl of stew for your birthright?”

Red’s stomach controlled his passion, so he made hasty decisions.  Haste leads to poverty (Proverbs 21:5).  Deceiver’s passion was his legacy; he would strive for significance, even if he achieved it through evil means.

This war between the natures of man continues to jostle back and forth.  You may have the two natures within you.  You may immediately identify with Red, or you may realize that you have a secret nature that relates to Deceiver.

This imbalance can stem from how we raise our children.  When a parent favors a child, they tend to put their imprint upon that child.  Isaac related to Esau, while Rebekah was devoted to Jacob.  Even though they were raised in the same household, they were parented separately, as if they were each living in a single-parent household.

We can see the devastating effects of single-parent households every day.  I can’t tell you how many horrific stories I’ve heard, where a fatherless boy is manipulated into deception by a predator because the boy needed a “daddy” in his life.  Boys crave the love of a father.

We need the balance of both natures. We need to be in the field, hunting, fishing, hiking, riding, exploring and adventuring, and we need to be thinking long term, so that our temporary appetites don’t forfeit our futures.

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This article is an excerpt from the book Fivestarman—The Five Passions of Authentic Manhood by Neil Kennedy.  To learn more about Fivestarman or to order your copy of Fivestarman—The Five Passions of Authentic Manhood please visit www.fivestarman.com.

You are free and welcome to re-publish, re-post, and in general share this article with any and all, so long as you keep all credits and links intact. For reprint rights, please contact us at info@fivestarman.com.

Influence

Want more influence in the office or workplace? Author Phil Cooke writes:

I meet too many people who feel ignored and dismissed at the office.  Their co-workers have stopped asking them for advice, they’re not being invited to key meetings, and management seems to overlook them.  Some people call it an “office doormat.”  Is that you?

Click here to read Phil’s full article.

Setting an example is not the main
means of influencing another,
it is the only means. -Albert Einstein

What If You Work For a Bad Boss?

It happens. No matter how hard you try, the fact may be that you simply work for a bad boss. But how is a Fivestarman to respond in such a situation?

Michael Hyatt offers the following five key points if you are in that situation.

• Manage your expectations.
• Evaluate the impact.
• Consider your options.
• Be assertive.
• Support him publicly.

Read Michael’s complete post and in-depth explanation of each point.

Be Happy

Of course that’s much easier said than done. Jon Gordon believes it may just be  a matter of focus. His suggestions?

• Focus on “Get to” instead of “Have to”
• Don’t Expect your Boss, Co-workers and Customers to Make you Happy
• Don’t Seek Happiness
• Focus on Excellence instead of Success
• Celebrate Together

Read Jon’s full article, Five Ways To Be Happier At Work here.

Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others,
you should put a good deal of thought into
the happiness that you are able to give.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

“Lucky for me, I ended up with a
boy whose favorite color is pink.
Toenail painting is way more fun in neon.”

Jenna Lyons’ byline for the recent J. Crew ad has stirred controversy—and rightly so—when a mother-son moment has mom painting the boy’s toenails pink. What could possibly be wrong with a laughing boy and an endearing moment with his mother?

The abandonment of authentic manhood is causing us to become increasingly a matriarchal society. Men are forfeiting their leadership roles in every place in society, but none is more evident than the role of fatherhood.

Women have always played a pivotal role in the household. In fact, the Bible says, “a wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands a foolish one tears it down (Proverbs 14:1). However, the traditional “head” of the household has always been the husband/father.

With men leaving the family household far too often these days, it causes the woman to become the parental dominant, reshaping the upbringing of the children, especially the boys.

Author Paul Adams, in the book Fatherless Children proclaims, “Boys who grow up in father-absent homes are more likely than those in father-present homes to have trouble establishing appropriate sex roles and gender identity.”

Dr. Keith Ablow called this gender confusion “psychological sterilization.”

This sterilization will have greater repercussions than simply raising girly-men. It opens the door for extreme, male-dominated societies such as Muslims to overtake us. Our impotence will no longer be a laughing matter or a childhood game.

Pink toenails on boys today. Wow. What’s next?

Related Stories

• Fox News

I can’t imagine watching a video of my 18-year-old daughter on TV, high as a kite, sucking on a bong, speaking gibberish, posing for semi-nude photos and laying all over a bunch of tweenage horndogs attempting to imitate an episode of Skins while knowing that there’s pretty much nothing I can do about her bad behavior but talk to Jesus and weep.

That sad and avoidable scenario I just painted has been Billy Ray Cyrus’ reality of late as he watches his famous daughter Miley follow Anna Nicole Smith’s path of doom (Billy Ray’s words, not mine).

In next month’s issue of GQ magazine, Cyrus the Senior states that he screwed up with Miley the Younger by allowing the dipsticks at Disney to hijack her soul and turn her into a narcissistic cash calf who takes her cues from immoral and greedy SOBs instead of Christ and common sense.

Not only did Billy lament the putrid path Miley’s “wholesome” Disney “handlers” took her down, but he was particularly POed at how they separated her from him and helped destroy his marriage just to make royalties off his little girl.

“But at least Billy Ray is rich,” some of you are undoubtedly thinking. Yeah, money’s a cure for all ills, eh dork? Well, BRC doesn’t think so and went on to say that if he had it to do all over again that he would not have let Miley get into the industry and would rather have had a sane, sober and safe offspring at home rather than millions of dollars, a Disney show and a daughter who imitates Snookie.

Now, I’m not here to beat up on Billy Ray, but Billy … what were you thinkin’, brother? You let hellish Hollywood run your life and your kid’s life. What did you think was going to happen? Those diphthongs in Tinsel Town don’t give two flips whether or not you and your kid live or die as long as their checks clear. Therefore, as you well know by now, they’ll push your kid and others to take kiddie porn pics, grind a pole at a Teen Choice award, shack up with a Justin Timberlake wannabe for PR and smoke salvia (yeah, right) if it’ll bank them some Benjamins.

I hope all fathers far and wide learn the serious moral in the Cyrus GQ story. Here’s what I gleaned from Billy Ray’s requiem:

1. Fame is BS. You can have it one year and be a drunken alley cat the next. So when it comes to your kids, focus on longevity, character, excellence, righteousness and true grit. True success is the business of greatness. And fame? Well, to be famous nowadays all a decent-looking girl has to do is get a boob job and sport the willingness to flash her va-jay-jay when she gets out of her car on Rodeo Drive. If she does that then BOOM! She’s a star!
2. If you, parent, put your little kid into the entertainment industry then you need to have your head examined-especially the inbreds who’re pushing their tots into kiddie beauty pageants. Lord, have mercy.
3. Trust no one who says they’re “here to help you and your kid’s career.” Being the dad of one famous daughter and one who’s well on her way, I can tell you that stringent oversight from me and those who loved my kids before they became sliced bread is the shrewd way to proceed with scum-sucking parasites seeking to feed off their success. Yes, feel free to fire, defriend and tell off any fool who gets in your way with what you know to be holy, just and true.
4. If anyone tries to put a wedge between you and your child, kick his or her a**.
5. Go online and show your kids what STDs look like when they’ve taken root in a promiscuous body. That’s an eye opener. FYI regarding STDs, kiddies: They’re not the walk in the park that the herpes commercials make them out to be, and there is, according to the Centers for Disease Control, a 25% chance that you’ll get one before you turn 20 and keep it until you take the big dirt nap. It’s so much fun!
6. Have your kids Google the economic stats of single moms.
7. Also, have your kids study the life lessons of those cute little stars who were destroyed through their inability to navigate through the minefield of pop culture crassness. That’s a sober and brutal cup of Joe.

I guarantee if Billy Ray wasn’t a man of prayer before, he sure as heck is one now because his hands are tied legally, and there ain’t a whole lot he can do to personally intervene. A heavenly intervention is probably the only way Hannah Montana will wake the hell up and follow heaven’s path versus that of her Beavis and Butthead buddies.

Parents, especially you fathers of girls, if you want to avoid the achy breaky heart Billy Ray is now experiencing then purchase my latest book, available now as a pre-sale titled, Raising Righteous & Rowdy Girls.

Pat Caddell, Fox News Contributor, says of my book, “Through every raucous and no-holds-barred page, Doug, the incomparable Dad Drill Sergeant, puts mere men through the paces to join the ranks of the few, the proud, and the successful fathers of super daughters. The proof of Doug Giles’ gold-plated credentials are Hannah and Regis Giles-two of the most fantastic, great hearted and accomplished young ladies I have ever known. This is THE BOOK that I will be giving the father of my two precious five- and three-year-old granddaughters. Tiger Mom, meet Lion Dad!”

About The Author

Doug Giles is the creator and host of ClashRadio.com (IRN/USA Radio Network), a winner of seven Silver Microphone Awards and two Communicator Awards.

In addition, Doug is a popular columnist, minister, artist, campus lecturer and author. His column is read worldwide each week on the nation’s largest conservative news portal,TownHall.com.

Self-knowledge has always been the key to preparing for competition. Knowledge of your attributes, abilities, interests, strengths, weaknesses, and traits is essential to riding the front end of the wave of change into the new century. To fully assess your own talents, realize that studies confirm that what we love and do well as children continues as our latent or manifest talent as adults.

Examination of your weekend or evening interests might reveal a gem of potential you can apply to your vocation. I strongly suggest you don’t unthinkingly relegate what you love to do for yourself solely to hobbies. You might make it, or at least integrate it into your life’s work.

The acquisition of knowledge, which is the new global power, is a life-long experience, not a collection of facts or skills. Not long ago, what you learned in school was largely all you needed to learn to secure a career. With knowledge expanding exponentially, this is no longer true. Hundreds of scientific papers are published daily.

Every thirty seconds, some new technological company produces yet another innovation. Your formal education has a very short shelf life. Life-long learning, once a luxury for the few, has become absolutely vital to continued success. Continue gaining expertise and avoid thinking like an expert.

Action Idea

An excellent benchmarking exercise is to spend a weekend with key associates or family members and dust off your childhood memories. Remember what you really enjoyed and wanted to do most as a child. The next activity in assessing your interests is considering your current ones. What do you most enjoy after work? What do you most want to do on weekends and vacations? What are your hobbies? Can you bring more of what you enjoy into your business life?

Action Step

Increase Your Reading, Writing and Vocabulary Proficiency.
One of the most important qualities of successful leaders is an ability to express thoughts and knowledge. Research by management and human resource experts confirms that no matter what the field of employment, people with large vocabularies – those able to speak clearly and concisely, using simple as well as descriptive words – are best at accomplishing their goals. Well chosen, carefully considered words can close the sale, negotiate the raise, enhance relationships, and change destinies.

In a world of email, instant messaging, voice mail, sound bites, concise reports, business plans, and meeting briefs, the individuals who can articulate their goals, substantiate their claims, and support their visions, will own the future. In the 21st Century, literacy will be the major difference between the haves and have-nots.

Why do fewer than 10 percent of the public buy and read nonfiction books? One reason is that many would rather get home than get ahead. They are motivated to get by and get pulled along by the company, the economy, or the government.

Another reason is that many individuals believe that information found in books, computer programs, and training sessions has no value in the business world. How self-deluding!

As the new tools of digital productivity continues to expand exponentially, the people who know how to control the new technologies will acquire power, while those who thought that education ends with the diploma are destined for low-paying, low-satisfaction jobs. In almost the blink of an eye, our society has passed from the industrial age to the knowledge era.

Increase your reading by 100 percent. Decrease your television watching, and that of any children in your family by 50 percent. Surf the Internet and subscribe to book summaries, or download free chapters from different sources. By reading book summaries, you can gain the essence of all the top business books in a very brief period of time.

Action Idea

Read at least one book each month, and listen to at least one additional audio book or education series during commute or down time.

Knowledge is the new power. And literacy is the door to knowledge.

Reproduced with permission from Denis Waitley’s Weekly Ezine. To subscribe to Denis Waitley’s Weekly Ezine, go to www.deniswaitley.com.

1. Have a Plan

Write a clear, concise plan of action for your money. Give your money an assignment. Money is nothing more than the ability to make exchange. You worked hard to have it transferred into your hands, now consider what you want to exchange it for.

The first step in your plan should be to free yourself from debt. Debt is the most destructive force working against you. The gravitational pull of debt is much greater than the numbers or amount alone would suggest.

Consider using what I call the Division of  Ten Principle. Every dollar is divided into ten:

• The first dime is the Tithe. I worship the Lord with this dime.
• The second dime is my investment. This dime will never leave my life. It is now forever in my employment.
• Dimes three through nine is for present living.
• Dime ten is surplus. This dime is reserved so that I never have to borrow a dime.

2. Start Small

Do not despise small beginnings. Solomon said, “When you gather money little by little you will see it grow.” If you are faithful in a little you will be made ruler of much. Consider your management of a penny as a qualification of a million.

David Green, founder of Hobby Lobby and related companies started his multi-billion dollar private corporation with a $600 investment!

3. Multiple Streams

Create multiple streams of income. Abraham was made rich in eight different streams of income (Genesis 24:35). Solomon said, “Give portions to seven, yes to eight, you do not know what disaster may come upon the land.”

If you have a fixed income – unfix it. You may have a good job at a secure company, yet you should always be in training, sharpening, and educating yourself for promotion. Start a business. Develop an idea. Invent something.

4. Be Consistent

Successful people do daily what others do occasionally. To gain the inertia of successful investment you must be consistent.

5. Think Long-Term

Secular people think only in terms of quarters and fiscal years. You have an eternal mentality; therefore, you naturally think long-term. Solomon said, “A righteous man leaves an inheritance for his children’s children.”

There will be seasons of great increase and seasons of decline but overall your investment will succeed as long as you don’t stay invested.

6. No Schemes

Do not get involved in schemes. There are a myriad of fraudulent people who use crafty schemes to make money. If it promises “that you will get rich with no effort” it is a lie. Walk away.

7. Protect Reserves

Store up don’t hoard up. Storing up reserves are important. It is suggested to have three to six months of reserves that would meet your basic living expenses if needed. You could even build it up to a year. Hoarding is stingily keeping money out of fear of loss or for the sake of pride. Hoarders become delusional and lose all they have.

8. Know What You Own

The Bible says, “Know the condition of your flocks and herds.” You should have specific knowledge of what you own. If you own stocks, you should know the company. You should never purchase what you don’t know.

Don’t compartmentalize your investments. I know a man who invests in “vice” stocks – those are companies who make their money on people’s sins and addictions. It is immoral to make money off the sins of people. I would never own tobacco, alcohol, or pornography companies. I won’t associate with them.

How do you get started?

Start small. Don’t despise small beginnings. Begin to read Dave Ramsey’s materials and attend his live seminars. I believe that he offers the best advise available for financial security, prosperity, and success. You will run into people who want to give you “free” advice which will ultimately cost you. Be careful to qualify those who speak into your life concerning money.

Be blessed and prosper.

]]> http://fivestarman.com/2010/09/eight-principles-for-strategic-investing/feed/ 0 http://fivestarman.com/2010/07/how-dads-can-love-their-daughters/ http://fivestarman.com/2010/07/how-dads-can-love-their-daughters/#comments Thu, 08 Jul 2010 15:19:33 +0000 Neil Kennedy http://fivestarman.com/?p=1031 As the father of two beautiful girls, I can certainly relate to the passion and instruction Mark Driscoll provides for how fathers should love their daughters. Good, practical, heartfelt advice.

Click here to view on YouTube.

What is the enchantment of the blockbuster hit “New Moon” and the upcoming “Eclipse” movies?   It is a mixture of the age old story line of young romance intertwined with a combination of the mystical seduction of vampires.

For some reason, this movie has not only attracted teenage girls but also has seduced their moms.  One of the young stars of the show revealed the bizarre incident when a mother who stood in line with her teenage daughter to meet him asked if she could take off her panties for him to autograph.

What you should know as a father:

Vampires are mythological beings who feed off of the blood of the living.

This is a direct assault on the teachings of God.  The Bible says, “Do not eat any meat with the blood still in it. ” ‘Do not practice divination or sorcery.” God established this on the principle that “life is in the blood.”  It is a practice of sorcery (evokers of the dead).

Vampires are representatives of fallen spirits who look upon women with lust.

The Apostle Paul instructed that women should have a covering of authority for the sake of the angels (1 Corinthians 11:10).  He was referring to the evil practice of angels who lust for women.  As a father, you are the authority over your daughter in the spirit realm.

Vampires are androgynous in appearance, gaunt and pale.

Their thin appearance is very different from their original descriptions as plump, bloated, monsters who gorged on the flesh and blood of the living.   The new image makes them more attractive and seductive to some women.

Vampires were originally synonymous with Satan.

The attraction to the Evil Being has always been on the base ideas of sexual relations.  There was a time that Genesis describes as when the ”sons of God had relations with the daughters of men.“ This is often considered as a time with the fallen angels intermingled with women.

For those who think that this story line is cute, consider this: A modern day vampire would be Jeffrey Dahmer, a serial killer who killed 17 people. His murders were particularly gruesome, involving rape, torture, dismemberment,necrophilia and cannibalism. The details of his story are gruesome and not worth exploring. If you think that its no big deal – think about your daughter being seduced by this vile man.

The bottom line is that creating a fantasy of the mythological vampire in the minds of young women (or for that matter adult women) is dangerous and offensive to what is right and moral.

Dear Dave,

How early should I start teaching my kids about money? Also, how do you feel about giving kids an allowance?

Cathy

Dear Cathy,

I think you should start teaching kids about money as early as you start teaching them about sex—which is the first time they show any interest. Make sure you keep it age-appropriate, and don’t over-answer questions when they’re young.

Neither of these things will amount to a one-time talk, because they’re both just parts of life. That means they’re ongoing processes that will last for years. If you have one talk at an early age with your kids about money, then they’re probably not going to remember a lot of it as they get older. If you have just one talk with your kids about sex at an early age, you’re liable to wind up with a bunch of pregnant teenagers!

To answer your second question, I hate the idea of an allowance for kids, because it makes the whole situation sound like welfare. We put our kids on commission at an early age. They had chores associated with certain dollar amounts, and if they worked, they got paid. If they didn’t work, they didn’t get paid. It was as simple as that. Then, they would split their money between three different envelopes—one for saving, one for spending, and one for giving—and we would teach them to do each one wisely.

Kids need to emotionally connect work to money at a young age. If you don’t teach them four major concepts—spending, saving, giving, and work—you’re going to have major problems by the time they’re 10 years old!

—Dave

++++++++++++++++++

No Pain, No Gain!

Dear Dave,

I’ve heard you talk to people about “gazelle intensity.” What exactly does this mean?

Del

Dear Del,

Basically, it means absolutely going crazy and doing whatever it takes for a little while to get out of debt. I’d much rather endure pain or discomfort for a short period of time and get it over with instead of living my whole life floundering around and accomplishing nothing in the process.

Some people probably think I’m using hyperbole when I give people advice on how to get out of debt, but I’m serious about it all. I’ve lived this stuff, man! There were literally stretches of years when we didn’t go on vacation or see the inside of a restaurant. If you want to get out of debt and get control of your money, you’ve got to be serious and intense enough to makes sacrifices on that level for a short period of time. We call it living like no one else, so that later you can live like no one else.

It’s not just dollars and cents we’re talking about here. It’s also about changing behaviors and mindsets. You don’t need to go to Disneyland every year. You don’t need to eat out every weekend. Until you’re willing to make temporary sacrifices like this—and become “gazelle intense” about taking control of yourself and your money—you’re never going to reach your goal of becoming debt-free!

—Dave

* For more financial help, please visit daveramsey.com.

Dear Dave,

What are the advantages of using a real estate agent versus going the for-sale-by-owner route when it comes to selling a home?

Seth

Dear Seth,

I’ve had a real estate license for 30 years. If I were to put my personal residence on the market today, I’d use an active real estate agent who really knows his or her stuff in the marketplace. I’d gladly pay them their commission, too.

Now, why would I do that if I could just sell it myself and save the commission cost? For starters, if I do a for-sale-by-owner, or FSBO, I’m only getting my place in front of buyers I can attract from seeing a newspaper ad, Craigslist, and anyone who happens to drive by the house. If you go with a high-octane real estate agent, you’ll have the advantage of being exposed to their entire pool of buyers. More importantly, you’ll be in the MLS, or Multiple Listing Service, database. There, you’ll immediately have thousands of potential buyers. So, who do you think will have the best chance of selling your house? Market exposure is everything in the real estate game!

And think about this: Even if you went the FSBO route every time you moved, you might do three or four of these transactions in a lifetime. A good agent closed three or four deals last week! They’ll know all the ins and outs of buying and selling a home, and they’ll walk you through every step of the process. Research has shown that between basic mistakes, pricing errors, and lack of negotiation skills, you’ll cost yourself more than the agent’s commission by trying to sell it yourself.

Trust me, you’ll get a much better deal—with a lot less hassle—by using a top-flight real estate agent!

—Dave

++++++++++++++++++

The Cost Can’t Be Justified

Dear Dave,

How much do you put into your old car for maintenance and repairs before it makes sense to buy a new vehicle?

Christy

Dear Christy,

I know a lot of people don’t believe this, but it’s almost never mathematically justifiable to go out and buy a new car, or even a newer one. Let’s say you’re driving a $1,000 car, and you keep having problems and putting $250 worth of repairs or maintenance into it each month. Do you realize how long you can keep putting that $250 into the car before you reach the point of it making sense to buy a new $10,000 car? I mean, we’re literally talking about years!

Really, it all boils down to a couple of things. One, do you have the money sitting around to pay cash for a new car? If you’ve worked hard and can go to the dealership and write a check for a new car, then go for it.

The second thing is the hassle factor. Is the car absolutely unsafe, or is it driving you nuts in terms of inconvenience and repair costs? If so, then you might need to look into getting a newer vehicle. You’ll notice I didn’t say a new car, right? And you still pay cash. You don’t want five or six years’ worth of car payments hanging around your neck.

I’m not against you having a nice car, Christy. What I’m against is your nice car having you!

—Dave

* For more financial help, please visit daveramsey.com.