The Capable Man: Session 7

The Capable Man: Session 7
March 20, 2017 Editor

The Capable Man: Session 7

Coaching vs Accountability

PRECEPT

2 Corinthians 1:24
That does not mean we want to dominate you by telling you how to put your faith into practice. We want to work together with you so you will be full of joy, for it is by your own faith that you stand firm.

PRINCIPLE

Coaching is leading men to draw upon their gifts.

In the above scripture, the Apostle Paul is revealing that each man will only stand firm by the practice of his own faith.

God gave man dominion over the earth, not domination over other men.

Domination: The exercise of control or influence over someone or something, or the state of being so controlled; submitted to the rule of another.

We have been taught the issue with men is we’re not accountable. The idea is that if we will enter into male-to-male relationships, we position ourselves to live the disciplined life of holiness by submission. This theory subscribes to the notion that “shame” is a great motivator.

Here are some obvious problems with this philosophy of men’s ministry:

  • Accountability positions men’s leaders as judges. A man must live the righteousness of other men.
  • Accountability positions the “submitted” as a child or even as a woman. It causes a grown man to be spoken down to.
  • In attempting to implement this accountability strategy, many men’s ministries have adopted militaristic themes and protocols as a strategy.
  • When men are forced into this perversion of the peer-to-peer relationship, authentic manhood is actually weakened, emasculated, and effeminate.
  • Every man who has ever asked me to hold him accountable eventually stopped talking to me.
  • The suggestion is that somehow we need men to open their hearts and release their emotions in order to purify themselves.

Men are emotional; however, the emotions of men are directly related to their purposes.

The word, heart, means, “seat of purposes; seat of appetites; seat of emotions.” The residence of purposes are within the heart of a man. When he gains understanding of his purposes, he dictates the appetites that determine his emotions. That’s why Paul said, “We want to work together with you so you will be full of joy.”

It’s simple. If a man lives by emotions he has uncontrolled appetites and perverts his purpose.

PRACTICE

I’ve found that when I speak to the five purposes of authentic manhood, men commit themselves to live them out and become very passionate about pursuing them.

How do we lead men? By taking on the nature of a coach or an encourager—someone who knows how to draw upon the gifts within a man and sharpen his life skills.

  • A good coach doesn’t clone players to be as good as he was — he challenges players to be as good as they can be.
  • Encourage one another daily, as long as it is called, “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. Hebrews 3:13
  • A coach edifies, encourages, corrects, even at times rebukes; however, the motivation is calibrate a man to the standard of God’s original intent of authentic manhood.

This may seem a bit nit picky​ on this subject, but in reality—using the accountability philosophy for men’s ministries has actually been a repellent for reaching men.

SUMMARY

  • God gave man dominion over the earth, not domination over other men.
  • The accountability theory of men’s ministry often leads to a perversion in the peer-to-peer relationship.
  • Men are emotional; however, the emotions of men are directly related to their purposes.
  • The word, heart, means, “seat of purposes; seat of appetites; seat of emotions.”
  • A good coach doesn’t clone players to be as good as he was — he challenges players to be as good as they can be.

Be Strong & Be a Man!

1 Kings 2:2

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