Don't Mistake Kindness For Weakness

Don't Mistake Kindness For Weakness
April 19, 2010 Neil Kennedy

Most people have mistaken the kindness of Jesus with weakness; therefore, in most men’s thinking Jesus was a weak “Gandhi” type religious figure of which they can’t relate. On many occasions, Jesus demonstrated incredible strength, whipping the moneychangers in Temple, rebuking demonic activities in people, resurrecting Lazarus from the grave, standing up for justice against a mob of men who wanted to stone a woman, just to name a few.

One of the keys to resurrecting authentic manhood is the willingness to be strong men. One area of strength that we must demonstrate is rebuking disloyalty from our ranks or relationships.

Let me give you an example of kindness being perceived as weakness. When King David was about to die, his son Adonijah was approached by political alliances to seize the kingdom by proclaiming himself as such. Their elaborate demonstration of pompous display looked foolish when King David appointed his son, Solomon to the throne.

In most cases, this kind of self-promotion would be met with a quick end; yet, Solomon showed kindness by not having Adonijah killed. Solomon said, “If he shows himself to be a worthy man, not a hair of his head will fall to the ground; but if evil is found in him, he will die.” (1 Kings 1:52)

It wasn’t long before, Adonijah begin to maneuver a scheme against Solomon’s kingdom. He approached Solomon’s mother, Bathsheba to make a request on his behalf. Although the request seemed harmless, Solomon saw right through it. Adonijah was immediately executed.

Donald Trump says, “One of the problems when you become successful is that jealousy and envy inevitably follow. There are people – I call them life’s losers who get their sense of accomplishment and achievement from trying to stop others.”

Several years ago, I made a horrible decision in my young leadership. God had blessed my efforts to build a church. Doing so, I had attracted a “dream-team” of staff members. One day, I noticed an odd sense of strife around the office. I began to hear reports of disloyalty, and disunity. Two members of my staff began to get puffed up in their work.

I should have terminated their employment immediately. The collateral damage of my indecision was hurt people. People didn’t know where to put their loyalties. It was one of my greatest regrets in ministry. I failed in my leadership by tolerating strife.

Characteristics of the Disloyal:

  • They graft off of your success and think that it is their own.
  • Although you raised them up out of obscurity, disloyal people are ungrateful, even despises you being in the position of leadership over them.
  • They covet. They want what you have at your expense.
  • They love dishonest gain.
  • They are smooth talkers.
  • They walk with a stealthy sense around you.
  • They have secrets.
  • They hear voices.
  • They mock and scoff at leadership.
  • They are critical.

Trust your instincts.

As a leader, you have a sixth-sense of understanding. Learn to check it with the actions, not just the words of those you are leading. As a father, you also have this insight on checking the influences of your children’s friends.

Test your employees.

Never promote without a test of character. Testing is for the approval of promotion. Check the facts around their “successes” making certain that they are proven results. Bonuses should be based upon integrity of results.

Terminate disloyal people quickly.

Disloyalty is contagious and destructive. When God faced a rebellion, He “cast” the disloyal ranks out of his presence.


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