Are Men Toxic?
In today’s cultural climate, the phrase “toxic masculinity” echoes through media, conversations, and even church pews. It’s a term that’s been weaponized to paint men as inherently dangerous, aggressive, or oppressive—a caricature of manhood that leaves little room for redemption. The world screams that men are the problem, that their strength is a liability, and that their very nature needs to be restrained or reengineered. But is this the truth? Are men toxic by design? Or has the culture lost sight of what authentic manhood was always meant to be?
As I’ve explored in my book, FivestarMan: The Five Passions of Authentic Manhood, God’s original intent for men is far from the distorted image we’re sold today. Scripture doesn’t depict men as burdens to be borne or threats to be neutralized. Instead, it reveals a purpose-driven design—a calling to live out five distinct passions: an adventurous spirit, an entrepreneurial drive, a gallant attitude, a faithful character, and a philanthropic heart. These aren’t just ideals; they’re the blueprint for manhood as God intended it. So, let’s contrast the cultural narrative of “toxic masculinity” with the biblical vision of authentic manhood and rediscover what it means to be a man in a world that’s forgotten.
The Cultural Lie: Strength Equals Toxicity
The culture’s version of toxic masculinity often zeroes in on traits like strength, assertiveness, and leadership, labeling them as oppressive or domineering. Men are told their natural instincts—to protect, to provide, to take initiative—are relics of a patriarchal past that must be dismantled. A man who stands firm in his convictions is called arrogant. A man who fights for what’s right is deemed aggressive. A man who leads his family is accused of control. The message is clear: masculinity itself is suspect, and men must apologize for being men.
Take the media’s portrayal of men—bumbling fools in sitcoms or ruthless villains in dramas. Rarely do we see a man celebrated for his courage or honored for his sacrifice. Instead, the culture cherry-picks the worst examples of male behavior—abuse, selfishness, or cowardice—and slaps the label “toxic masculinity” on the whole gender. It’s a sleight of hand that ignores the root of sin in every human heart, male and female alike, and instead scapegoats men as uniquely flawed.
But here’s the problem: this narrative doesn’t just misrepresent men—it robs them of their purpose. If strength is toxic, why did God create men with it? If leadership is oppressive, why did He call men to steward the earth? The culture’s answer is to suppress these traits, to neuter manhood into something passive and compliant. Yet, that’s not what Scripture reveals.
The Biblical Truth: Strength with Purpose
Genesis 1:26-28 lays the foundation for authentic manhood: “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth…’” From the beginning, man was given a mandate—to rule, to cultivate, to bring order out of chaos. This wasn’t a license to dominate others but a call to reflect God’s character through purposeful strength.
Adam wasn’t toxic; he was tasked. He was placed in the garden “to work it and keep it” (Genesis 2:15), a dual role of cultivating life and protecting it. His strength wasn’t a flaw—it was a gift meant to serve. And when sin entered the picture, it didn’t make masculinity toxic; it corrupted the application of that strength. The fall didn’t rewrite God’s design—it distorted it.
Look at the men God chose throughout Scripture. David, a warrior-poet, danced before the Lord and slew giants, yet wept over his failures (2 Samuel 6:14, 1 Samuel 17:50, Psalm 51). Abraham, a man of entrepreneurial faith, left everything to follow God’s call, trusting in promises he’d never see fulfilled (Genesis 12:1-4). Jesus Himself—the ultimate Man—wielded authority with humility, power with compassion, and strength with sacrifice. “He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:8). If that’s masculinity, it’s anything but toxic—it’s redemptive.
The Five Passions of Authentic Manhood
In FivestarMan, I outline five passions that define authentic manhood, rooted in God’s original intent. These stand in stark contrast to the culture’s accusations:
Adventurous Spirit
The culture says a man’s desire for adventure is reckless or selfish. But God wired men to explore, to take risks for His glory. Think of Noah building an ark amid ridicule (Genesis 6) or Peter stepping out of the boat onto the waves (Matthew 14:29). Adventure isn’t toxicity—it’s faith in action.
Entrepreneurial Drive
Society often frames ambition as greed or domination. Yet, God called men to create, to multiply, to subdue the earth (Genesis 1:28). Joseph’s rise from slavery to stewardship in Egypt (Genesis 41) shows how a man’s drive can bless nations. It’s not about power over others—it’s about provision for others.
Gallant Relationships
The world mocks chivalry as outdated or patronizing. But Scripture honors men who defend the weak and uphold justice. “Rescue those who are being taken away to death; hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter” (Proverbs 24:11). Gallantry isn’t oppression—it’s protection.
Faithful Character
Culture celebrates the “bad boy” and scorns commitment as boring. Yet, God exalts fidelity—men like Daniel who stood firm in a pagan land (Daniel 6) or Hosea who loved relentlessly despite betrayal (Hosea 3). Faithfulness isn’t weakness—it’s strength under pressure.
Philanthropic Heart
The stereotype of the selfish, macho man crumbles when we see God’s call to generosity. “Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered” (Proverbs 11:25). From Boaz providing for Ruth (Ruth 2) to Paul collecting for the poor (2 Corinthians 8), true manhood gives.
These passions aren’t toxic—they’re transformative. They don’t oppress—they elevate. They don’t destroy—they build.
The Real Toxicity: Sin, Not Manhood
If we’re honest, the problem isn’t masculinity—it’s sin. “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). When men abuse their strength, it’s not because strength is evil; it’s because sin twists what God made good. The same goes for women—pride, manipulation, or envy aren’t “toxic femininity”; they’re the fruit of a fallen nature. Blaming manhood for human brokenness is like blaming a hammer for a poorly built house. The tool isn’t the issue—the user is.
The culture’s solution—shaming men into submission—only deepens the wound. Men don’t need to be emasculated; they need to be redeemed. And that’s where the gospel comes in. Christ didn’t come to abolish manhood but to restore it. He took the curse of sin upon Himself so men could live out their calling without shame. “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1). The answer to toxic behavior isn’t less masculinity—it’s true masculinity, surrendered to God.
Reclaiming Authentic Manhood
So, are men toxic? No. Men are broken like everyone else, but their design isn’t the defect—their disconnection from God is. The culture wants to rewrite the script, but God’s already given us the original. Authentic manhood isn’t about lording power over others; it’s about laying down your life for them. It’s not about proving yourself; it’s about proving faithful. It’s not about taking; it’s about giving.
We see this in Jesus, who said, “The Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:28). That’s the model. That’s the measure. And that’s the mission for every man reading this. You weren’t created to shrink back, to apologize for your existence, or to conform to a watered-down version of yourself. You were created to rise up, to reflect God’s image, and to live out the passions He planted in you.
Action Step: Take the 45-Day Challenge
If you’re ready to reject the culture’s lies and embrace authentic manhood, I’ve got a challenge for you. At FivestarMan.com, we’ve designed a 45-Day Challenge to help you ignite those five passions—adventure, enterprise, gallantry, fidelity, and philanthropy—in your life. It’s not about becoming someone else but becoming who God made you to be. Over 45 days, you’ll get practical steps, biblical insights, and a community of men to walk alongside you.
The world may call you toxic, but God calls you His son. It’s time to live like it. Head to FivestarMan.com today, sign up for the 45-Day Challenge, and reclaim authentic manhood together. The culture doesn’t get the final word—God does. And His word is clear: you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), called to a purpose that’s anything but toxic. Let’s start living it out, one day at a time.
Neil Kennedy is the founder of FivestarMan.com, dedicated to inspiring men to live with purpose, passion, and a relentless work ethic rooted in biblical truth.
