5 Gentlemanly Ways to Treat Your Wife
Gentlemen, let’s talk about the gallant pursuit of honoring the woman God has entrusted to you—your wife. In a world that often cheapens relationships, the FivestarMan rises to a higher standard, reflecting Christ’s strength, nobility, and tenderness. Scripture calls us to love our wives as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25)—a tall order, but one we’re equipped to fulfill with intentionality and grace. Here are five gallant ways to treat your wife that blend biblical inspiration with practical application, igniting a spark of chivalry in your marriage.
1. Speak Life with Gallant Words
Words are a gentleman’s sword—wield them to build, not break. Proverbs 18:21 reminds us, “death and life are in the power of the tongue.” A gallant man speaks life into his wife, affirming her beauty, strength, and worth. Tell her she’s captivating, not just when she’s dressed up, but in the everyday moments—when she’s pouring coffee or chasing the kids.
Practical Application: Start each day with a specific compliment, such as “You make our home a sanctuary” or “Your laugh lights up my world.” Be sincere and consistent, and watch her spirit flourish under your words.
2. Serve with Gallant Strength
A FivestarMan doesn’t sit back while his wife carries the load alone. Jesus Himself washed His disciples’ feet (John 13:14-15), showing that true strength serves. Gallantry isn’t about grand gestures alone—it’s in the quiet acts: washing dishes after a long day, fixing that leaky faucet she mentioned, or taking the kids so she can breathe.
Practical Application: Pick one task she dreads this week and handle it without being asked. Let your actions say, “I’m here to lift your burden,” proving your love through sweat and sacrifice.
3. Protect with Gallant Vigilance
As husbands, we’re called to be guardians of our wives’ hearts and minds, just as God watches over us (Psalm 121:7-8). A gallant man shields his wife from harm—whether it’s stress, criticism, or temptation. This doesn’t mean control; it means creating a safe haven where she thrives.
Practical Application: Check in with her emotionally. Ask, “What’s weighing on you today?” Then listen—really listen—and pray over her. Stand as her defender, even against her own doubts, with a steady hand and a bold heart.
4. Pursue with Gallant Passion
The Song of Solomon is a masterclass in pursuit—bold, poetic, and unashamed. A gentleman doesn’t let romance fade into routine. Your wife isn’t just your partner; she’s your beloved, worthy of chase even after years together. Gallantry keeps the fire alive, showing her she’s still the one who turns your head.
Practical Application: Plan a date night this week—something simple but thoughtful, like a picnic under the stars or a slow dance in the living room. Whisper to her, “You’re still my favorite adventure.” Let her feel desired, not just needed.
5. Lead with Gallant Faith
A FivestarMan doesn’t just follow Christ for himself—he leads his wife toward Him. Joshua declared, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15). Your faith isn’t passive; it’s a banner she can rally under. Pray with her, dream with her, and point her to the One who holds your marriage together.
Practical Application: Initiate a five-minute prayer together before bed—just you, her, and God. Share one thing you’re grateful for about her, then lift up your hopes as a couple. Lead her gently but boldly into God’s presence.
The Gallant Difference
These five ways—speaking life, serving with strength, protecting with vigilance, pursuing with passion, and leading with faith—aren’t just good ideas. They’re the heartbeat of a gallant husband, a man who reflects the love of Christ in tangible, everyday moments. Your wife isn’t looking for perfection; she’s longing for a man who shows up, sword drawn, ready to fight for her heart.
Marriage is a battlefield, gentlemen, but it’s also a proving ground for your character. When you treat your wife with gallantry, you’re not just blessing her—you’re becoming the man God designed you to be. Proverbs 31:23 says her husband is “known in the gates” because of his noble character. Let that be you—respected, admired, and cherished, starting at home.
Action Step: Take the 45-Day Challenge
Ready to step up? Join the FivestarMan 45-Day Challenge. For the next 45 days, commit to practicing these five gallant ways daily. Speak life, serve her, protect her, pursue her, and lead her in faith. Track your progress, reflect on how it changes your marriage, and watch God multiply your efforts. Sixty-eight percent of the men who have finished the 45-Day Challenge said that it transformed their marriage. Sign up at FivestarMan.com and become the gentleman she deserves—and the man you’re called to be.
Neil Kennedy is the founder of FivestarMan, a movement dedicated to awakening authentic masculinity through biblical principles and practical wisdom.
