How to Resurrect Authentic Manhood in Your Life
In my book, Fivestarman: The Five Passions of Authentic Manhood, I’ve laid out a roadmap for men to reclaim the deep, God-given purpose coursing through their veins. After years of ministering to men, consulting with businesses, and wrestling with my own journey, I’ve identified five passions that define what it means to be an authentic man: an adventurous spirit, entrepreneurial drive, gallantry in relationships, faithfulness in character, and a philanthropic cause. These aren’t just ideas I cooked up—they’re rooted in Scripture, tested in life, and waiting to be unleashed in every man reading this. Let me walk you through them, straight from my heart to yours.
1. An Adventurous Spirit: Get Your Fight Back
I believe every man’s got an adventurous spirit burning inside him. It’s that pull to step onto the field of contest—be it a football turf, a golf course, or the wild outdoors—and clash with something bigger than himself. I think of JJ, a kid I wrote about who lived for the game until an injury sidelined him. He drifted into a mundane life until a whisper hit him: “Get your fight back.” That’s the spark I’m talking about. It’s not about chaos; it’s about sharpening yourself through struggle, like iron on iron (Proverbs 27:17).
Men relate shoulder-to-shoulder, facing challenges together. Look at David—he didn’t become a warrior king overnight. He honed that spirit alone in the pasture, facing lions and bears before taking on Goliath. I’ve been there too, wrestling with God in a hammock under the stars, begging for help, only to hear Him say, “Neil, get up!” That’s the adventure—stepping out, risking it, and finding your strength in the fight. You’ve got to get dirty sometimes, brothers. The refined life can kill this passion if you let it.
2. Entrepreneurial Drive: Man Is the Economy
God’s first words to man were, “Be fruitful and increase” (Genesis 1:28). That’s the entrepreneurial drive I’m talking about—it’s in your DNA to create, provide, and multiply. I’ve always said man is the economy. Forget the lie that there’s only so much pie to go around; God’s design is abundance, not scarcity. Solomon nailed it: “As goods increase, so do consumers” (Ecclesiastes 5:11, my paraphrase). Your work isn’t just a paycheck—it’s a vocation, a divine invitation to steward the earth.
I’ve seen too many men excuse themselves from this passion, settling for less than they’re capable of. But when you tap into it—whether you’re starting a business or innovating on the job—you’re fulfilling God’s intent. It’s not greed to want increase; greed’s when you covet at someone else’s expense. This drive is about provision, for your family and beyond. Stir it up, men. Don’t let it die under the weight of routine.
3. Gallant in Relationships: Cultivate Your Garden
Being gallant in relationships means you’re a cultivator—first of the earth, then of your wife and kids. The word “husband” comes from that root, and it’s your job to sow life and wisdom into those God’s given you. I’ll be blunt: if your wife’s a mess, look in the mirror. Proverbs 24:30 talks about the sluggard’s field overrun with thorns—that’s on you, not her. I’ve seen it too often: men who neglect this duty, leaving their families to wither.
This passion’s about more than romance—it’s about protection and guidance. Your seed, physical and spiritual, shapes the next generation. I tell men to guard their purity like David wished he had (Psalm 119:9). Lead your wife, not like Adam who failed Eve, but with courage and faith. She’s your helpmate, designed to complement you (Genesis 2:18). Celebrate her strengths, and you’ll see a harvest that reflects your care. That’s gallantry.
4. Faithful in Character: Walk the Walk
Faithfulness in character is your bedrock. It’s about walking with God daily, letting Him refine you through the wrestle. I’ve been there—depressed, restless, crying out in the night, only to have God push back and challenge me. That’s when I found His blessing, like Jacob refusing to let go (Genesis 32:26). It’s not about being perfect; it’s about staying true when no one’s watching.
A faithful man is prudent, disciplined, and wise. He manages his money, honors his wife, and hungers for God’s Word. I’m sick of hearing men are simple-minded—leaders read, brothers! Patience and diligence mark this guy; he doesn’t chase quick fixes (Proverbs 21:5). Build your life on Scripture—it’ll scrub your thinking, guide your steps, and lift you above the pack (Psalm 119). That’s the character God honors, and it’s what makes you a man others trust.
5. Philanthropic Cause: Leave a Legacy
The philanthropic cause is your deep desire to leave the world better than you found it. It’s not about stuff—nobody’s hauling a U-Haul to the grave. It’s about legacy. I wrote about Robert, a guy who hit the top and asked, “Now what?” He found his answer in helping kids escape poverty, and it lit him up. Ecclesiastes 3:11 says God’s put eternity in our hearts—that’s this passion, pushing you beyond yourself.
Giving’s a joy, not a burden. I laugh at folks who say, “I don’t give to get.” That’s pride talking—God expects a harvest from His giving (John 3:16), and so should you. Start small: clean your closet, help a widow, sponsor a kid. I’ve seen men ignite with purpose doing this—creativity flows, destiny steps in. That’s legacy, brothers. Live while you’re living, and make it count.
The Challenge: Man Up!
I wrapped the book with the Fivestarman 45-Day Challenge—a way to live these passions out. Ryan’s story shows it: a guy beaten down by life, who found hope in these truths and turned his world around. These five passions are rivers in you, flowing from God’s original intent. They’re not optional; they’re who you are. Dig into them, and you’ll resurrect the authentic man God made you to be.
I’ve spent over 15 years preaching this: you’re designed for adventure, provision, leadership, integrity, and impact. The world’s trying to bury that under feminization or apathy, but I’m calling you out of the tomb. Man up, draw on those deep waters (Proverbs 20:5), and let’s change the game together.
